Category Archives: Posts

How do you see you?

I believe it’s not until you reach your thirties when you truly discover who you are, your life is no longer defined by what other people think of you, but is defined by how you see yourself.  When you truly see you, that’s when it all makes sense.  That’s when you can remove the hurdles that have prevented you from moving forward – your path becomes clearer – this very transition happens to most people at some point, call it a moment of clarity but either way, it’s at this point when it all comes together in our mind and we know what we really want for the rest our lives.  This most definitely happened to me, I became my own women, I reached out and started to make things happen, in my early twenties I would have been too afraid, and lacking in confidence and far to worried about other peoples opinions of me.

Someone once said to me if you want something badly enough then reach out and make it happen – this is so very true.  Your dreams and wishes will not fall into your lap but if they could, would you really want them to?  Would you really appreciate them if you had no input into the end result?  Where would the satisfaction element be and would it not take away all the fun and adventure?

Dreams are your creation – from start to end.

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A poem I wrote aged 10 years old

Loneliness is a hurting feeling, in which I can’t explain,

It comes at you from no-where and brings you so much pain.

I close my eyes and fold my arms,

And clutch your photo in my palms.

Loneliness is a hurting feeling in which I can’t explain?

 

No one sees me now I pray there eyes will open wide

Stop what there doing put things aside.

If just for a moment so you can see,

I need some ones help to fix broken me.

Loneliness is a hurting feeling in which I can’t explain.

 

By DG Torrens aged 10 years old…

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Stay positive!

Being positive is something that comes naturally to me, even when I’m up against it my glass is always half full! There is always light at the end of the tunnel and where there is light there is a way! Yes I know what you’re thinking it should be “where there’s a will there is a way” and of course you would be right – however I like my quote too! Being positive opens so many avenues it makes all the hard stuff so much easier to think about – for instance if your having a bad day, maybe you have missed the train and its raining, you don’t have an umbrella so you are soaked through, most people instantly feel grumpy and irritated and will probably be a bit off with their work colleagues when they finally arrive at work. Once they have logged there phone on and received there first call of the day, the poor person on the other end will more than likely receive a bad reception as a result of your bad morning (not their fault!) … which will only encourage more negativity for you as the day goes – like dominoes effect. However if you received the events of your morning differently – you will get wet anyway, the train has left without you – a bad mood will not bring it back … but you still have control over your day. How you choose the rest of it to unfold is entirely dependent on whether you allow that morning to switch your mindset to negative mode.

So I conclude – its far easier to be positive – it makes for a better day, a better reception from everyone around you, and most definitely more productive no matter what you have planned. And then there’s that old cliché “life’s just too short” … this is so very true! So why waste your time being negative? It takes up too much time and energy leaving you (and others around you) feeling down and angry.

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A productive writing day!

Today has been a very productive day as far as my writing goes!  I have written 3,500 words this afternoon – and feeling exceptionally proud of myself, my little princess was taken out for a few hours shopping with her Grandma while I was tapping away like a wood pecker!  My book is coming together beautifully – there are days where the words just flow out of me without any difficulty whatsoever, and today was one of those days!  Then I have days where I just cannot seem to get what I want to say down before me?  This is odd as I already have the story in my head – it is a true story after all!  Sometimes I remember things in the wrong order so have to back track and insert that chapter or paragraph into its rightful place.  Just because you have a ready made story by no means does this make it any easier to write down as I am discovering of late.  You have to be 100% sure of all the facts you are writing about, my research so far has bought about conversations with various people who have passed through my life during specific events I am writing about.

It has proven to be invaluable so far and has helped correct my vision of one or two events.  As time passes by, some events can appear a bit cloudy in your mind, and you just need someone else to clarify what is stored in your memory bank … or correct you if necessary. These discussions have also triggered memories I had forgotten about completely.  During my research process I have also collated information from various governing bodies to add credence and also back up my story.  I have been amazed at the incredible support I have received during the writing of my story and hope one day this will inspire many people.  Once I have completed my story I hope to finish my thriller based novel soon after, which I am also very excited about!!  So yes, today was a good writing day!

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A shared thought …

 

I think it would be very ignorant of us all to assume that in this vast universe we share with other planets that we were alone.  Whilst I was writing away this evening it was all quiet, all I could hear were the leaves rustling on the trees in my garden, my curtains were open and I stopped writing for a while to appreciate the stillness, the quietness, which is a rare moment in my household!  I was looking at the stars twinkling away, millions of them uncountable, so very bright, I stared in wonder at the beauty of the site before me so mesmerised was I – so I allowed my mind to open its doors to the possibilities of life on other planets, more to the point what would I do if confronted by another life form?  Mmm I told myself I would be dignified, (that translates into not running away screaming!), I thought I would at least give the situation I was faced with a fair moment of my time, until it was proved unworthy (then I would runaway screaming!)

After I gave way to my thoughts for a considerable length of time, I remembered my task at hand, writing my book!  I had gone so far off track I could not find my way back – another planet?  No!  In need of a break?  Oh yes – this however is not a bad thing at all I say to myself!  It was one of those moments when I needed to step away from the computer and re-group after all it was very late…

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Immortality v mortality

Immortality is a luxury only the young can afford to believe in!  When your in your teen years and early twenties you really do think you will live forever, you put off today what can be done tomorrow, throw caution to the wind.  I remember myself thinking “I will never get old” now it does not seem as far away as I once thought!  A year as a child used to seem like an age now it feels like a week. I gave birth to my princess on the 01/01/2009 – yes that’s right new years day a special offering I will treasure for ever!  She will be 3 years old in a few months, how did that happen?  Where did that time go?  Did I miss something?

 Apparently not – time passes by so very quickly i have discovered, I’m thankful that I am of an age where I can appreciate the importance of making the most of every single precious minute!  To look directly into the eye of time and say this moment is mine its not yours for the taking just yet … I often wish I could stop the world and get off for just a little while, to stop time right at the very moment you need to memorise a special look, or special smile, or special place, so its set deep in the confines of your memory never to be forgotten – ready and waiting to be drawn out of your memory bank as and when you need it.  Time is not to be taken for granted but to be cherished, and over the years my outlook has switched from those of that teenage girl I once was.  Now I think that If something can be done today, don’t put it off until tomorrow, just in case tomorrow is not available.

With youth comes beauty with age comes wisdom. As you get older you loose one and gain the other!  I conclude: immortality v mortality, I would take mortality every time – this is what makes us human

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Self employed without pay! Never been happier…

Yes that’s right – WITHOUT PAY- I am working and working very hard!  I write late into the night every night once my beautiful princess is settled for the evening, and do you know what this is the best job I’ve ever had and I have supplied myself with the position!  I think this is pure genius.  No breaks, no pay, no benefits, no holiday pay and no pension. I am doing exactly what I always wanted to do, my payment is in the creation of my writing which hopefully one day in the near future may bring me a modest income.  I find as a boss to myself I drive me very hard, much harder than employers ever did, this is because the passion is so deep with in me that I want to write well, I want to produce something that other people will also want to read.

This fits in so well with my most important job of all being a mother, to be able to work around my princess without it affecting her is like pure gold to me!  Having the backing of my husband helps enormously of course – without it my dream would be on hold. So do I miss being paid a salary – not at all … the trade off is too high.

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